The Best Game You Can Name…

I’m a girl who loves to cook and I happen to be very good at it. However, like many of my gifts, I don’t share that information with just anyone because I just don’t like doing it all the time. It’s what you’d call a hidden talent. Anyway, just recently, I got into a small fender bender (which might have been partially Hockey Guy’s fault since we were fooling around in my car)… Regardless, Hockey Guy has been a real sweetheart, calling and texting me to see how I’m doing, how’s my car, and generally being a good guy. I know the reason for that could be him wanting to stay on my good side (since I put out and he likes my very naughty side), but in reality, he’s a really sweet guy who genuinely likes me as a person. So, because I am a sucker for sweeties (who happen to be cute and in great shape), yesterday I went grocery shopping to purchase all the ingredients to cook my famous manicotti.

I was planning on baking it for Guy as thanks for trying to help with the situation… I know how men feel about their food and am familiar with that old (yet true) cliché about the way to a man’s heart, but hell, I also just wanted an excuse to spend more time with him. My manicotti takes at least an hour to cook so I picked up a variety of cheeses and crackers, strawberries and blueberries for an appetizer. I ended up preparing the entire dish at home (excluding the baking) and bringing it to his place. Unfortunately, I had forgotten the crackers at home so we went out, very casually, and bought more. I mention this because that simple action was TORTURE for me – it gets very difficult to control yourself, your hands, and your mouth when your body temperature goes up and you have certain thoughts racing through your head before you even arrive at his place.
Upon finally returning to his place, we watched a bit of television and ate the manicotti – delicious as usual (though more torture). In fact, Guy is such a gentleman that he didn’t initiate anything for the first half of the evening. He told me that I’d have to be in charge of that…

No problem!

The man is smoking hot. Tall (6′1″), blond, and still in a-mazing shape from his NHL days. I may have mentioned before that he was a hockey player… What I meant was National. Hockey. League. Professional hockey. Hello! And let’s just say he’s most definitely not lacking anywhere else either. Long, firm, broad and solid. Like a brick wall – or a good right winger. The epitome of oh-my-goodness. Maybe not as big as Irish (who is?), but a very very close second.

Most of the time was spent closely examining his (ehem) muscles, yea.. muscles…, and heating up his leather couch. Despite being a sweetheart (on the outside), the man has an extremely wicked and wide naughty streak – enough to match me, which I found both intriguing and impressive. And worthy of thorough testing and re-testing. Needless to say, we didn’t quite make it back into his bedroom until it was time to sleep, where we promptly passed out from lack of energy (a good night).

It must have been the spent energy, because I slept pretty well with him. He even warmed up a banana nut muffin in the morning for me (literally). In exchange, I left him some of my delicious manicotti to eat later. I’m hoping I’ll get to see him again soon since he is quite delicious and enjoyable, in more ways than one. Food, sex, and breakfast… does it get better than that?

-Amalie Paris

And don’t forget to follow me @AmalieParis on Twitter so we can chat it up

With Valentines Day just around the corner, there’s no better time to do a self analysis and ask yourself, “Why Don’t I Have A Girlfriend?” It’s a tough enough just to ask yourself that question, but even harder to answer it. Luckily our friends over at ForkParty.com came to the rescue with how you can turn your dilemma upside down. Their list of 5 may seem like common sense but sometimes that’s all your missing in your pursuit for a significant other. Sometimes you’re simply over thinking things and just need a new perspective. Here are the first 2 reasons you don’t have a girlfriend according to ForkParty.com. Be sure to click the link below and check out the rest…

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I Knew I Wore A Dress For A Reason!

Kay has persuaded me that I need to wear dresses more often. It is pretty warm outside and I do have nice legs, so it didn’t take much convincing. However, she has entirely too many dresses and I have too few, so we were forced (twist my arm) to go shopping. I won’t bore you with the details, but later that night, I got to wear one of those fabulous new dresses, and holy crap, the attention it got! Kay was right!

Our original plans were to find a sugar daddy. I had decided Kay deserved one just as much as I did, so we hit a more upscale bar in a neighboring city. But first things first – we were hungry, and no one gets between my food and me. At some point, a few super cute friends of mine meandered into the bar, so they got some hugs, some conversation, and an introduction to Kay, my cohort in crime. As they headed out, they invited us to meet them later at a club.

As it tends to do, my attention wandered and I noticed a foursome across the bar from us (it was pretty empty otherwise). They were older guys, ranging from 40-something to mid-50s, but the one on my left caught my eye. He was cute with a European face, but never smiled. I had my mark. I finished my soup and wandered over there; by that time, my short skirt, long legs, and high heels had already gotten his attention.

I opened with, “You look pretty European, and I was wondering if you had an accent.” Well, confident girls get away with awful opening lines like that, so it actually worked. He responded, and yes, he had an accent, but it was a strong Canadian one (!)… I told him I had been watching him and wanted to know why he didn’t ever smile. He had noticed me watching someone in his direction, but hadn’t actually thought I was looking at HIM (he apparently did not realize there was a brick wall behind him). He also hadn’t realized he hadn’t smiled all night. That soon changed.

We chatted more (partially because he was a good conversationalist; partially because I love Canadians and their accents; and partially because he was pretty darn cute). I noticed his buddy had a mullet and a big, flashy Stanley Cup ring on his pinky. My suspicions were aroused. That could only mean one thing. Intrigued, I asked about it. Ah ha! The European face with the Canadian accent now makes perfect sense… Hockey Guy and I ended up swapping digits before we both headed out, and he promised he’d call. The night was already exceeding expectations!

Kay and I ended up heading over to the exclusive club to meet my friends. We got drinks, hung out with the guys, danced up a storm, showed off our dresses and our legs — it was entirely too much fun. Kay and I conversed with different men, swapped, and talked more. Toward the end of the evening, I made my selection: Charlie Brown. He was tall, cute, and had that really short brush-cut that makes you want to run your hands, back and forth, over his scruffy hair.

Sitting in our shadowed corner booth, Charlie and I stopped talking and started making out. It heated up very quickly and his hands started to wander south. I didn’t stop him – I couldn’t… He whispered suggestions softly into my ear and we took off, practically running and laughing into the parking lot, where I was given the opportunity to cross off, not just one, but two requirements from my Bucket List (in one swell foop): (1) A one-night stand — my first ever; and (2) sex in a car.

I’ve never had sex in a car. I’ve given head in a car… while the guy was driving. I’ve been fingered and licked and gifted several ‘cookies’ in a car. But I’ve never had official sexual intercourse in a vehicle. It is an experience, but one I advise should be done in a Jeep (do a commercial for that!).

With regards to logistics: Charlie and I were in the back seat of one of the larger-model Jeeps. He had moved the front seats forward to give us more space (very thoughtful) and came back for me. The back seats are pretty deep, and he might’ve put the back of the seat down, though admittedly, I had other things on my mind and I don’t remember. All I know is that I was on the bottom, he was on the top, and dresses provide easy access for both parties’ enjoyment.

Delight and gratification ensued.

It was that hot, frenzied type of sex that follows those long, smoky looks and wandering hands; the immediate attraction that excites and boils your blood until you’re grateful for the cooler night weather and wind to cool you off and slow down your motor afterwards; when you look back at the windows after being physically satiated and they are fogged up by the temperature, intensity, and passion just shared that can only be produced by the basest of sheer animal attractions…  I am getting wet just remembering it.

I felt very satisfied and very naughty pulling my dress back down when we were finished, but also very content with that little Cheshire grin on my face. Then again, feeling naughty is one of the best feelings ever.

-Amalie Paris

Got a question for me?  Wanna chat?  Find me over on Twitter at @AmalieParis

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Thanks Alligator-Sunglasses.com for shedding light on this epic fail

We all drool over the celebrities that surround our daily entertainment day in and day out. We imagine spending a night with that sexy Patrick Dempsey from Grey’s or that unbelievable Megan Fox from Transformers. How often, though, do we imagine the sexiest stars coming together and producing perfect babies? We’ve come up with a few combinations of performers that would be sure to create the next generation of beauty…

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G-d Bless The Irish

I keep adding to my Excel spreadsheet (it ended up being a really good idea)… Everyone likes variety!

Guy #5: Irish. Irish has been a friend of mine for quite a few months now. He is extremely easy to speak to, smart, sweet, and funny. I’ve always thought he was really cute, and to top it off (for me), he’s got short, spiky blond hair and these gorgeous green eyes. At the beginning, we would flirt lightly with each other and have serious conversations at coffeehouses, but one night I got bold (after thinking about him in some very particularly wicked ways). When he asked me if we were going to hang out soon and what I wanted to do, I responded…

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