Perhaps you are an avid text massenger. Perhaps you are a frequent internet user. Perhaps you are trying to meet someone online. This is not an article about online dating sites or tips to find that special cyber-someone, but rather one about the most neglected online art: typing.

While a good intentioned “UR CUTE” may show one’s heart is in the right place, what it’s really saying is “I am too busy to put my thoughts in the form of a complete sentence, but if you’d overlook this and be flattered, that would be fantastic.”

Think about it: If your online profile or private message is the first contact with someone, then it’s just as important as a verbal introduction. Even more so…what you type is there in all of its misspelled, poorly punctuated shame, to be read over and over again and mocked by the entire internet forever.

What not to do:

Forgetting about the Shift Key

“yo horsefan7 i really liked you’re profile. i too am a fan of horses and am myself 7.”

This is roughly the equivalent of having a conversation with a severe mumbler or a mental patient. No capitalization just looks sloppy. Also, not knowing the different between “you’re” and “your” is the kind of thing that drives English teachers crazy.  And when we say English teachers, we don’t mean English University professors, we mean second grade English teachers.

Forgetting about the Word Processor

“I’m a full time sutdent, and intelegence is really importent to me.”

If you are typing in your average modern browser, odds are you have no excuse to make these sort of flagrant errors, because many browsers now come loaded with a word processor. That’s not to say it’s going to catch everything, but if you don’t take the time to double check your dating site profile, how is anyone supposed to believe you’ll take the time to double check your actions later on (There is no spell check for leaving the seat down). For the grammar Nazi looking for love, a misspelling might signal a crippling character flaw.

"DO YOU COME HERE OFTEN?"

Remembering the Caps Lock Key Way too Much

“HEY THERE BOY, LUV YOUR PROFILE PICTURE!!!!11!!!1!”

We already know that the Caps Lock Key is a secret code for shouting but when trying to woo someone, it’s not the way to go.  All of a sudden what was meant to be attractive and flirty calls to mind a crazy person. Also: spell your words. “Luv” (or its close relative, “Wuv”) is only appropriate on the mushy Sweetest Day greeting cards that you’ll be buying if for some reason, the recipient of the above Caps Bomb decides to date you.

…So next time you fill out a new profile or send a message to someone you don’t know, remember that you’re grammar may determine if you get the response that you’re hoping for.